I really enjoy writing Ask Lauren posts. I get together with my LC.com editors and read through questions you all post in the comments, which are always very interesting to discuss. Today I’ll be covering the topic of friend feuds: What to do when your besties are in a fight and you’re stuck in the middle…

This is a place I have definitely found myself in before, where neither one of my friends had wronged me personally but I was inevitably stuck in the middle of their argument. The hard thing about this situation is that you want to support each friend, but there are obviously feelings of betrayal from one friend if you take sides with the other.

My approach with petty issues is to try and stay neutral, even if I do secretly have a side. However, if I know that one friend did something really wrong and I feel strongly about it, I will speak up. After gathering my thoughts, I will calmly say something like, “Hey I don’t want to take sides, but I’m afraid what you did might be affecting your friendships.” Obviously this might turn into a little argument of it’s own, but I truly believe that you are the company you keep. Your friends and relationships are a reflection on you. So if one of your friends is doing something you really don’t agree with, you should politely voice that. If it’s a minor issue that is strictly between your two friends though, stay out of it and just treat both friends equally (easier said than done, I know).

Sometimes friendships fall apart and that’s unfortunate. But it’s important to not let it change your own relationships with those friends. Things change, and that’s part of life. When all else fails, my best advice is to always, always follow the golden rule: Treat others how you would like to be treated.

Have you ever been stuck in the middle of a fight between two friends? What about a fight with your bestie?

Leave your stories below and feel free to leave some Ask Lauren requests too. You might see your request in my next blog post!

XO Lauren

 

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  • Zoe

    I need advice… So my friend Kayleigh and I we’re hacking our other friend Hannah’s snapchat because she gave me her password. All we we’re gonna do was post a pic saying hacked on her snapchat story but then Kayleigh wanted to look through Hannah’s messages with her(kayleighs) boyfriend Andrew. So kayleigh looked through the messages she found messages of Andrew telling Hannah that he wants to have sexual intercourse with her and them saying they love each other,Hannah calling him daddy and stuff like that…. then we found pics of Andrew (kayleighs boyfriend) kissing Hannah. Kayleigh was certainly upset, but Kayleigh is saying it’s all Hannah’s fault and that Hannah forced Andrew to do stuff like that. So Kayleigh is giving Andrew another chance and said we all have to drop Hannah as a friend… I said it’s a bit unfair to give Andrew another chance and just kick Hannah away…. Now Kayleigh told me that I had to choose between Hannah and Her and I don’t know what to do because it’s unfair to Hannah but Kayleigh has been my best friend for 4 yrs… What do I do?