Ask Lauren: How to Deal with a Friend Feud

Ask Lauren: How to Deal with a Friend Feud
I really enjoy writing Ask Lauren posts. I get together with my LC.com editors and read through questions you all post in the comments, which are always very interesting to discuss. Today I’ll be covering the topic of friend feuds: What to do when your besties are in a fight and you’re stuck in the middle…

This is a place I have definitely found myself in before, where neither one of my friends had wronged me personally but I was inevitably stuck in the middle of their argument. The hard thing about this situation is that you want to support each friend, but there are obviously feelings of betrayal from one friend if you take sides with the other.

My approach with petty issues is to try and stay neutral, even if I do secretly have a side. However, if I know that one friend did something really wrong and I feel strongly about it, I will speak up. After gathering my thoughts, I will calmly say something like, “Hey I don’t want to take sides, but I’m afraid what you did might be affecting your friendships.” Obviously this might turn into a little argument of it’s own, but I truly believe that you are the company you keep. Your friends and relationships are a reflection on you. So if one of your friends is doing something you really don’t agree with, you should politely voice that. If it’s a minor issue that is strictly between your two friends though, stay out of it and just treat both friends equally (easier said than done, I know).

Sometimes friendships fall apart and that’s unfortunate. But it’s important to not let it change your own relationships with those friends. Things change, and that’s part of life. When all else fails, my best advice is to always, always follow the golden rule: Treat others how you would like to be treated.

Have you ever been stuck in the middle of a fight between two friends? What about a fight with your bestie?

Leave your stories below and feel free to leave some Ask Lauren requests too. You might see your request in my next blog post!

XO Lauren

 

Photo: Joan Holloway
Categories: Ask Lauren, Grow, Lauren Conrad
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