Book Club: Girls in White Dresses Q&A

Book Club: Girls in White Dresses Q&A
I hope everyone is enjoying reading Girls in White Dresses so far. As promised, today I will be sharing our first question and answer session for this book. If you read up to the chapter “An Animal Called Ham,” like I recommended, you should be able to answer the questions below. Here they are…

Questions

  1. Which character do you relate to most and why?
  2. What do you think Isabella learned from the scenario with JonBenét?
  3. Why do you think the author wrote about Ellen and Louis’s relationship and them getting back together? What message does this story have?
  4. The girls in this book tend to be indecisive about their jobs, their relationships and their lives in general. How does this symbolize the life of a 20-something and why?
  5. Why does Abby decide to keep her hippy parents a secret from her friends? How do you think this affects her life?

My Answers

  1. I personally relate to both Isabella and Mary. On one hand, I can identify with Isabella because it’s easy to have a sense of uncertainty about relationships in your early twenties. But I also relate to Mary because I understand her strong work ethic and career-focused mentality.
  2. The scenario with JonBenét teaches Isabella to be less judgmental of others, especially before she’s gotten to know them herself. The situation also reveals Ben’s true colors as a boyfriend, and ultimately ends up leading to their breakup.
  3. I think that the author wrote about Ellen and Louis’ relationship for a couple of reasons. One was to juxtapose someone who settles for a bad relationship (like Ellen) with someone who knows when to move on (like Isabella). I think the author also included this piece because everyone has a friend like Ellen. It’s a tough lesson to learn, but you can only try to help a friend like Ellen so much. Sometimes you can’t intervene in a friend’s relationship even if you don’t approve.
  4. Entering the real world post-graduation is a daunting experience for a lot of young women. You go from being a big fish in a little pond to being a tiny fish in a gigantic pond practically overnight. You can read my posts on How to Conquer the Real World and 10 Things Every Girl in Her 20s Should Know for more advice on this stage of life.
  5. Abby is embarrassed and afraid of being judged by her friends. But Abby’s constant insecurities about her family only end up hurting her in the end.


Now it’s your turn! What are your answers to the questions above?

Leave your responses below and keep an eye out for my announcement about when our Live Book Club chat will take place. In the meantime, keep reading!

XO Lauren

Photo: Amazon
Categories: Book Club, Lauren Conrad, Read
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  • Jackie s.

    1. I would have to say I relate the most with Lauren. I am at that point in my life where I am stuggling to figure out what I want to do with my life, and during the book we kind of see Lauren go through that as well. While all her friends seem to have successful jobs, getting married, and starting a family, she is still figuring out what she wants to do and who to be with.

    2. After Isabella met with JonBenet she learned not to be so quick to judge a person. And to not judge a book by it’s cover. She turned out to be a really nice person, that had Isabella been even more judgmental she might have really missed out on a potential friend.

    3. I will be honest, the Ellen and Louis chapter wasn’t one of my favorites. However, I think it was needed to add another perspective of common relationship issues that friends see especially in their 20′s.

    4. I think this book, especially with all the different types of characters, is a great reminder for some girls that life isn’t what you expected it to be. I am at that stage in my life where I graduated college 2 years ago, and I still have no idea what I want to do with my life, or where I even want to live. This is a great reminder for girls in their 20′s that in the end it will all work out, and while it’s not perfect now, life never is perfect, and you just have to go with it. However, you also have to go after what you want to make it happen, especially when it comes to your career.

    5. I think Abby is embarrassed by her hippy parents (this chapter made me laugh very hard by the way because I am from Vermont, although I am the furthest from a hippy, I am sure I have met people who could be her parents if she was real), and that is why she hides them. She is trying to be someone else, and if people knew who her parents were she fears that would change their outlook on her. By keeping this guard up about her parents and where she comes from makes it hard for people to connect with her.

  • Ashley

    I’m so sad I can’t participate in this! I went to get the book from the library, b/c I’m old school like that, and there is at least one person ahead of me on the list for it, probably because of this site! :) As soon as it’s available, I’ll fly through it, I’m sure.
    This year has been an incredible reading year for me!
    Ashley
    http://dreamliveandrepeat.blogspot.com/

  • Megan Bailey

    1. I feel I can relate most to Lauren. I she is kind and spirited, but I feel her pain and worry about finding a job.

    2. I think Isabella sees the truth about Ben and ultimately leads to their breakup.

    3. I agree that everyone has a friend like Ellen, so it makes her character relatable. I also think that the author uses Ellen to show that even though you may see a relationship one way doesn’t mean there isn’t another side. People don’t see all the sides of a relationship unless they are the ones in it. I was surprised that they ended up together, but I also thought that there must have been more behind closed doors.

    4. Every woman in this book is indecisive and unsure because that is what your 20s can feel like. Will I get a job after college? Will I get engaged? Where will I live? I’m 22 and I have the same questions in my future.

    5. I feel like it is out of pure embarrassment. It does come back to haunt her because it effects her relationship with her fiancee and ends their engagement.

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  • Katelin Absher

    I have not had the chance to pick this book up yet, but have heard great things about it!! I think its next on my list!!!

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  • Lindseyn86

    1. I can relate to Isabella because I am indecisive about relationships. Up until my current relationship, I felt that I couldn’t love a guy longer than a year. Now that’s changed and I’m happy about it!

    2. The scenario with JonBen

  • Bsmyth

    1) I relate to all of them really… I think at one point or another I’ve been in each position and felt strong about my career or horrible about a relationship. I like each personality and find traits from each in myself.

    2) Not to talk about people when you don’t really know them. I think she learned how ugly and mean it was for everyone to be making fun of this poor girl when none of them really knew her.

    3)I think she wrote about the relationship to show you all sides of it. It would have been helpful for me to read about it when I was in a relationship like that. seeing how my friends see the relationship would have been eye opening!

    4)I agree that 20′s is a hard time figuring out what your doing with your life. Also having friends getting married always puts the pressure on even if your not there yet you start asking yourself those questions about what you want in someone and what you want to do for the rest of your life.

    5)I had a really hard time relating to Abby and her parents. My family isn’t that normal and you have to embrace it! I want to sit and chat with her and tell her its okay not to worry so much what other people think. That she’d be a lot happier if she relaxed.

  • COURTNEY

    1. I most relate to Isabella. She’s exactly like me how she acts & our interest in guys are similar. Ben sounds a lot like my boyfriend.
    2. The situation teaches her that you can’t judge someone before you get to know them. She sympathizes for jonbenet & wants to get to know her because other people didn’t take the chance to really get to know her.
    3. I think the author wrote about ellen and louis’ relationship to show that some girls are willing to settle, while other girls, such as Isabella are hung up on one guy. It shows the contrast between the different characters’ personalities and interests.
    4. I can completely one hundred percent relate to the indecisiveness. I’m indecisive about a lot of things in life, but when it comes to the early & mid 20′s, it’s time that you are forced to make tough decisions so i’m going to have to learn to overcome it. it’s not a great trait to have. At least i don’t think!
    5. Abby wants to hide the fact that her parents live a hippy lifestyle, because they are very different from most other girls’ parents. I think she’s ashamed of how different they are and embarrassed, and she thinks that her friends would think that her parents are weird because they’re different. However, to Abby’s surprise, she finds that her friends think that her parents are cool and that she has nothing to be embarrassed of. Because her parents are different, that makes them unique. Abby not realizing that her friends actually like her parents, and not accepting and embracing her parents uniqueness, will just make Abby’s parents realize that she’s embarrassed of them & ultimately will create more insecurity in her family.

  • Ashley S Wilson

    1.I definitely relate most to Lauren. I have probably been working the longest out of all my friends, but I feel like I’m still the one searching for my purpose in life. Everyone seems to know what they want in their future and I can’t seem to pin it down. I am chalking it up to I am meant to do many things..
    2.Isabella definitely learned that there is more to a person than meets the eye. It’s not always a black and white situation and you can’t make assumptions without knowing the whole story.
    3.I have a few friends who are “”Ellens”” It just shows that no one can make your decisions for you and you have to do what is best for you. IT also shows that being a true friend is supporting them no matter what they choose to do in their lives and relationships.
    4. I have learned so much about myself and life in my 20s. Its the time of your life when you’re free to make mistakes and change your mind 10 times and I think that’s the beauty of it. That is how you learn to be who you really are. Your 20′s are the most formative years in my opinion.
    5. Abby just assumed that normal is a big house in the ‘burbs with white picket fences and sit down dinners. She let others determine her normal. Instead of embracing it as a unique background which most people wish for and crave, she chose to hide it and feel embarrassed which led to her not being true to herself. When you aren’t true to yourself, you end up miserable which is just not worth It.

  • Nicole

    1. I think I relate to Isabella the most… While reading the book, I found myself thinking “”Dang, Isabella sounds just like me.”” While all her other friends are off getting married and having kids, she’s just kind of stuck living day to day… not really knowing what’s next.

    2. I believe the situation teaches Isabella not to judge a book by it’s cover. Sometimes you’re quick to judge someone, but they can turn out to be a complete surprise.

    3. I think the moral of the story for Ellen and Louis’s relationship was to show that some girls will settle. I know some girls personally that are like that, and I know that at one point I was willing to settle. If it’s not meant to be, it won’t work. It also shows that if you make your opinions about someone’s significant other known, that you might lose that friend entirely.

    4. I’m 22 years old, and I’m constantly questioning whether I want to stay at this job, or apply elsewhere… and sometimes I don’t even know if I want to stay in this state. I wonder whether my boyfriend (whom I love and am totally happy with) is going to be the right one. It’s not that I’m afraid I don’t want to be with him forever, but you never know with guys. I feel like they change their minds more than girls. I think it’s a time to not only find yourself, but to find the people you could see in your life from here on out.
    5. Abby is embarrassed by the way her parents act, so she decides to keep them a secret. I honestly think it stressed her too much, and that she cared too much about what others thought.

  • Nathalie xo

    I just joined laurenconrad.com and I’m going to order this book! Being that I recently hit my 20′s I’m sure I could relate to this book a lot! Can’t wait to start reading it.

    http://nattaps.blogspot.com/

  • Brea Steward

    1. I think I can relate to Isabella the most because she doesn’t really seem to know what direction she wants to be going in her life, especially with guys and her job. I can definitely sympathize with her because I’m in that stage of my life right now.

    2. I think Isabella learned that not everything or everyone is who they seem to be from the outside. She learned that JonBenet was just a nice girl looking for love and she learned that her boyfriend was very rude and judgmental of others. Ultimately, Isabella realized that Ben was not good for her.

    3. I think the author wrote of the Ellen/Louis relationship because she wanted other girls to realize that you can’t change a person no matter how hard you try. Ellen’s friends kept trying to tell her to date other guys and different types of guys but Ellen knew that Louis was the one for her, despite what he did to her and what her friends said about him. I think the author wanted the readers to learn a lesson from this relationship.

    4. I’m currently a college student but I can relate to why the girls are so indecisive about everything. The reason is because we’re all trying to figure what we want but the pressures and perceptions of the world can get to the best of us sometimes. It is part of life that we have to go through to find ourselves.

    5. Abby keeps her parents a secret because she’s embarrassed that she doesn’t have the “”normal”” life that she thinks her friends have. Going through life trying to pretend to be something you’re not affects others around you because when the do get a glimpse of the real you they might not like that you’ve been pretending and they could walk away.

  • Kellie Norton

    I’m reading this book with my best girlfriend and we are LOVING it! We’re both 23 and nowhere near ready to be married. We were both born and raised in the South, so we’re definitely the black sheep in that culture since we’re loving our careers and our single life. We both relate to Mary just because we’re very career focused. We love the guys we’re seeing, but we moved to NYC for reason… to succeed as a PR girl and a lawyer :-)

    Thanks for choosing this book! It’s so perfect for girls like us :-) Can’t wait for the live Q&A!

    -Kellie

  • HNew

    So excited to finally be a part of the book club conversation!

    1. I feel like I relate the most to Isabella because when she gets stressed out and needs a break she turns to her family for support. She’s also trying to figure out what direction to take in her life, and i’m proud of her for knowing when to leave the job that she hated.

    2. I couldn’t help feeling creeped out by the Jonbenet reference, but Isabella needed that experience to open her eyes to how much Ben sucked. She was able to see how cruel he and his friends were and it did help her see that she needed to move on.

    3. I think the chapter about Ellen and Louis was important and i’m glad Jennifer Close included it. It’s something that is all too commonly seen: beautiful girl settling for a lame loser guy. Not only did Ellen settle and marry a sleazy guy, she also allowed him to replace all of her friends. It’s too frequent that a girl will settle down with a guy and leave her friends behind.

    4. It’s fair that the girls are indecisive about life because being in our twenties is scary! A lot of things are uncertain and we have to try and forge our own path. It’s pretty intimidating and sometimes you have to experiment with this and that to find where you fit.

    5. Abby is definitely uncomfortable with her parents because she has been exposed to what some would call “”normal.”” Her hippy parents mean well though and ultimately are the ones that will be there for her (even if it is in odd ways). When she gets dumped by Matt the first people she turns to are her parents. The nature of her parents definitely makes her more closed off from her friends and makes it harder for her to open up and make real connections.

    Loving this book so far! I’ve been meaning to read it for a while and when I saw it was selected for the book club I knew now was the time to get on it!

  • Emma Fox

    such a good book!

    http://www.foxtrotbravo.blogspot.com

    Emma:)

  • Angela0419

    I am loving this book!

    1. I relate most to Isabella. My best friend is currently in law school and I feel like Isabella, always trying to balance her fun, young life with Mary and her supportive, understanding friend of a law student life. I can also relate to her with how new life is for her when she left college. You just have to dive in and hope your response is to swim when the options “”sink or swim”” are presented.

    2. I think Isabella learned that she related more to JonBen

  • Bluebird

    1) I find Isabella and Mary most relatable due to the fact that Mary, like me, is always reading, studying, and hardly ever has time for anytime of relationship; with Isabella the fact that she is so unsure of what career path she should take and having to go back and live with her parents, is pretty much where I am now.

    2) The lesson here is to not “”judge a book by its cover”” cliche I know, but it really is true. Until you have actually met someone, you shouldn’t make assumptions; everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.

    3) Ellen and Louis’s relationship is one almost everyone can relate to, there has been a time where one of our friends date That Guy; we all tell her how much of a jerk he is and how she can do way better, but no matter what you say she just stays stuck on him. In the end we should support our friends no matter if you disagree on who they date, because one day when things go bad, they will know that no matter what happens you will always be there for them.

    4) The characters are all over the place and indecisive because honestly twenty year olds are exactly that, indecisive. We are still filled with our dreams of how life is supposed to be and how we are supposed to live but we forget that we are in a real world where Disney doesn’t sponsor our every decision. It takes a while to realize that things are hard but sooner or later you’ll find your way and the rest is history.

    5) Abby hides her parents because she’s embarrassed, she grew up in a school where girls seemed perfect and when she met their parents she realized just how different she was so like everything else in her life she hid it, if something seemed odd or not quite right she would do everything she could to hide it; she favored other peoples opinions and in the end it just made her more miserable.

  • Lola

    1. I feel I am most like Lauren. No, not because of the name. LOL. But I sometimes feel as though I think the exact things Lauren says out loud. I feel in my group of friends that I say what ppl are thinking but there too shy to say it out loud. I dont mean it to be rude, Im just bold and frank with ppl. I think that is Lauren, too.

    2. I had an exact experience and I think myself and Isabella def learned to never judge a book by the cover.

    3. I think there is a comfort level here between Louis and Ellen. I almost feel as though at the beginning, they’re discovering who they are and what they want. They feel as though they have to separate to see this but realize they don’t have to when they are apart. And all her friends see outside the box and they see the “”back and forth.”” I feel the message is to trust yourself but always have your friends opinions taken into account. Your friends know you too:)

    4. Totally can sum up my life! I cant say it about my career but bfs and gfs. Everyone of my friends are currently engaged, babies, etc at this time in my life and my inner “”Lauren”” is feeling and saying what she says in the book! lol

    5. #1 All ppl can be embarrassed of their parents! Its a known fact. But in this sitch, maybe she sees all her other gf’s parents as this “”normal”” parents thing: rules, old farts, and/or retired. She doesnt see other parents acting the same as hers. I think it is making her not trust herself as well as being afraid of opening up with her parents and telling them how she feels.

  • shel billett

    1. I can relate to Lauren the most.
    In my 20′s I too have had to serve to pay the bills. I’ve dated the wrong guy… for too long, wrong job for too long without taking the time to ask myself if I was happy. But that’s what being in your early 20′s is about, learning about yourself and what you are capable of and what makes you happy. Some people just figure it out 2easier, some people need all the life experience to get there. Im early 30′s truely happy and blessed right now and wouldn’t change much of how I got to be in this place.
    2. I agree, sometimes the source of the gossip/opinion also needs to be factored in, then in person make your own mind up.
    3. It reflects what happens in real life, friendships change and the only people who know what the relationship is like, are the 2 in it.
    4. Oops I answered this as part of 1.
    5. I feel that Abby hurts herself by keeping her family (who love her unconditionally) a secret, because it prevents her from really opening up her heart to people to make friends and fall in love.
    Loving the book and so happy to be apart of this Book Club! It’s my 1st!

  • Ashley Nieto

    1. I saw a lot of Lauren in myself. They way she is unsure of everything and doesn’t know really what she is doing or is going to do. The guy who is below her league and she doesn’t really care for sounds a lot like my last ex. We all need a little time to just coast. Also, I don’t sugarcoat and get in trouble for it all the time. lol!
    2. She probably now understands there’s a lot to a person underneath their outer exterior. While she was obsessed with getting married she was also genuine and sweet which had Isabelle not had that personal conversation with her, she would never had known.
    3. It is a cliche. We all have that one friend. I was even that one friend until my Louis passed away. It makes us relate to the situations of the friends and even some as myself Ellen.
    4. This is the whole aspect of being 20. It’s the end of our childhood and beginning of our future. We are well aware what we do now affects the rest of our lives and that can be a scary thought. Thus why the indecisiveness.
    5. Abby is embarrassed by her upbringing. Since she hides this part of her life from her friends, she is hiding a part of herself and in the long run she will never feel truly herself unless she brings this part out. @ashnieto

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  • shel billett

    Loving the discussion and comments, also the laughs this book has given me already! The Ham animal – classic.
    It was really hard to stop reading, where to do we stop next Lauren? x

  • Suzi Davenport

    1. I relate to Isabella most because of the way she feels when it comes to family. She feels like her parents love her sister more, and I can definitely relate to feeling like the child in the background.
    2. I agree with Lauren and I think Isabella learned not to judge people before getting to know them and what Ben was really like.
    3. I think the author wrote about Ellen and Louis’ on and off relationship because everyone knows a couple like that (or is in one!). I think the author was trying to show that even though you can try to help your friend see how damaging her relationship is, at some point you just have to let it go and let her learn her lesson the hard way.
    4. I think the girls’ general indecisiveness about their lives symbolizes the lives of 20-somethings by showing women at a stage where they are looking around at each other to try and gauge where they think they should be, job-wise, relationship-wise, etc. Suddenly, these women feel small again and don’t know how to go about making themselves feel more in control.
    5. Abby is embarrassed and afraid that her friends will judge her and think she is like her parents. This causes her to not have strong relationships because there is a part of her that she is holding back.

  • kristine

    Love reading this book, I can relate to the girls and the situation they are going through!

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  • Josselyn

    1. While I can’t really say I connected with any of the characters, I think I clicked the most with Isabella. I think this was more because she is focused on the most out of the characters so far, and in many of the family situations she finds herself in, I find myself connecting with her emotions and thinking, “”I’ve been there!””
    2. I believe that Isabella’s meeting with JonBenet was created to force her to realize how poorly she is treating herself. As many of us have discussed, Ben is not the cream of the crop. He is selfish and freeloading. By seeing how cruel he and his friends are to JonBenet, Isabella realizes that her relationship is not meant to be and that judging people is wrong. I believe that at the end of her meeting with JonBenet, Isabella came away slightly jealous of the happy, carefree life JonBenet lives.
    3.I think the message Close was trying to convey with Ellen and Louis’ troubled relationship was that to hold onto the past is comforting. As we read, Ellen and Louis meet in college and date some out of college, a time where we all go through many changes. Ellen’s transition from young, college adult to working, making a living adult I’m sure forced her to make many new changes in her life and perhaps dating Louis was a comfort to her during hard transitions that were not explored deeper in the novel.
    4. Adding on to my response to question 3, I believe these characters and most 20-somethings are indecisive about decisions in life because of the transitions they experience. They go from being dependent on their parents financially and emotionally in college, to leaving that comfort zone and supporting themselves. Also, during one’s 20′s the brain is still growing so mistakes, indecisiveness and constant changes are bound to happen. We just don’t know!
    5.I agree, I think Abby is embarrassed by her parents’ personalities and their jobs. Yes, she doesn’t want to be compared to her parents by her friends, but also her friends and their parents are from completely different backgrounds where farming and marijuana are uncommon. To Abby her background is blunt and rough, were as, her friend’s backgrounds are clean and pristine. She simply wants to fit in.

  • Jenster13

    1. I can relate to Isabella and Abby. I can relate to Isabella, because I understand completely how she feels about her job (feeling like you will be there forever) and not being happy at something you thought you would be which is what she is feeling so far at the publishing job. In addition I can also relate to her overall uncertainty about her relationships and being looked down on for not being married and settled which I believe Molly does.
    I can relate to Abby, because I understand what it is like to have things or people in your life that you do not want to share with others, and when you are not completely comfortable in your own skin and/or those around you then most likely you will hold back and either not allow people too close into your life or be paranoid that you are going to lose them.

    2. I also agree that the scenario with JonBenet taught Isabella to not judge someone based off of what you have been told about them. Get to know them yourself, and from there form your own opinion.

    3. I think every female has had a friend like Ellen, someone who settles for less than what she deserves, because either she doesn’t believe she can do any better or because she really does believe this is what she has earned. What I have learned with friends like this is you sometimes have to just sit back and let them make their own mistakes. If they believe they are in love and/or desperate then most likely they won’t listen.

    4. Not only do women feel indecisive about life in general in their twenties, but in some cases women in their early thirties feel the same way too. Our whole lives we have know nothing but school, and being grown up was a “”someday”” thing. Well then you graduate, are officially dropped into the real world, and then I feel like women have this pressure to have their life figured out. You don’t always know what job will make you happy, you wonder why you are not married with kids and probably even start to question if that’s what you even want. It gets hard sometimes when you see all your peers supposedly “”moving on,”” and you feel like you are stuck in the same place, not knowing which direction to go.

    5. Abby keeps her parents a secret, because along with being judged, she is afraid that others will use their opinions of her parents as a deciding factor in how she will be placed in their lives. Also, when she got engaged, I think she was paranoid that she would lose her fianc

  • Breanna Thurman

    Really enjoying the book so far!

    1. I probably relate to Mary the most. I have always been focused on schooling and working hard. I have also had roommates who I felt were distracting me or always having boys over, etc. However, I definitely would try to balance that out with a little bit of fun!

    2. The JonBenet arc was really well done I thought. I think you don’t know what someone else has been through unless you’ve walked in your shoes. It’s also easy to think you know someone based on a few comments someone has made about them. Also, just because someone has different ideas than you about an issue doesn’t mean view is right or wrong necessarily.

    3.We all know someone like Ellen! This part was so funny to me! Anyone else been watching #retroMTV in the mornings and remind you of good old J.B. and Audrina??

    4. This is a pretty theme common among twenty-somethings lately. I think it’s important to write about so others know they’re not the only ones. On the other hand, it’s okay if you are married and do have your career figured out in your 20′s.

    5. Haven’t read this far yet!

    Happy Reading!

  • Amber Nicole

    Loving this so far!
    1) Though I’m 23 and already married, I feel I relate best to Mary because she is so driven to achieve her goals and is very career minded. I had to move away from a distracting roommate and there were many nights in college I had to put off my social life so I could work toward my goal of becoming a wedding planner. While this was difficult at the time, it paid off when I got my dream job!
    2) Definitley not to judge a person based soley on the opinions of others. People perceive things differently.
    3) I think most everyone has that one person they always go back to, and it’s not until you let go of that person and allow yourself to move on emotionally that you can meet “”Mr. Right.”” I think in this case Louis was Ellen’s emotional crutch. She became so dependent on him and sought his approval that she ultimately settled for less than she deserved. As a friend you want to intervene and give your opinion, but there comes a point when you’ve said your piece and need to allow a friend to make their own decisions.
    4) Entering into the “”real world”” is terrifying! I think what makes us all so indecisive is growing up you have most things mapped out for you then graduation hits and it’s up to you to decide the rest of your life. When faced with an infinite amount of choices, it’s easy to become indecisive.
    5) She is embarrassed by her family and tries to fit in and be what society would consider “”normal.”” Her insercurities about her eccentric family and her strive to be different from them end up making her come off clingy and ultimately hurting her and her relationship with her fianc

  • Courtney Fallon

    1.) I feel I relate most to Lauren, I got a job so I could pay the bills but I eventually stopped trying to get the job I actually want. I see how she settled in just like I did and needed a reality check to realize that isn’t what she wanted.
    2.) Isabella learned not the judge others before she gets to know them. She learned how to not let others opinions shape how hers will be. She learned that Ben is not for her an that he is not mature enough for their relationship.
    3.) Ellen and Louis’s relationship is unfortunately a common relationship one of our friends always happen to get into. It’s hard to watch a friend be treated in a way where they are head over heels and the other doesn’t truly care about them. It shows how the friends care and how it is a hard situation to put in put towards the relationship because they wouldn’t understand.
    4.) Being indecisive about life in your early 20′s is now a common situation. Graduating from college in an economic collapse doesn’t provide the job openings for which we went to school for making it difficult to really go for what they want. Most don’t know what they want because what the really want to do is no longer available for them to do.
    5.) Abby is definitely embarassed by her parents and family. They aren’t your typical family and do things the way her friends families do get together a and visits. I think this made her very insecure thinking that everyone is judging her based on her family instead of getting to know her. Once they get to know her she is still insecure thinking that one day they will just leave her due to her family.

  • Kelly Lynne

    1.) A year and a half ago I was in Isabella’s. Dead-end job that I hated, and stuck in a relationship that I knew I shouldn’t of been in but stayed anyways…for the company.
    2.)I love how Isabella eventually figures out that JonBenet was actually a nice person. It shows that we can’t always listen to someone else’s judgemental opinion about another person, that we should form our own opinions.
    3.) Ellen and Louis’ relationship was your average damaged, no good relationship. Louis treated Ellen like she was nothing, yet she kept going back to him. I think we all have been through a similar relationship or know someone who has. It was very relatable, and I think that is what the author wanted; her readers to be able to relate to the characters she was writing about.
    4.) I am not even half way through my 20′s and already I have made some changes (mostly for the better.) Again, the author wrote about characters that any girl in their 20s could relate to. This time in our lives is a time to fail and get back up. We change our minds again and again. These are the years where we discover who we really are. It’s exciting and frustrating, but it is all worth it.
    5.) Abby was ashamed of her parents, and it kept her from sharing a part of her life that was important. She should have embraced their differences and realized how much they loved her. It would have made her a lot more confident in life and her relationships.

    XO

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  • Lindsey Glass

    1) I think I am a mixture of Mary, Ellen, and Abby. I have a great job and I’ve worked very hard to get where I’m at now, but throughout my life I’ve always fallen for bad relationships, until I met my husband. I also have an insecure side, like Abby does about her family.

    2) I think Isabella learned that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover. It wasn’t until Isabella talked to her in person that she realized that behind all the makeup and hair, it was a very good person. I have a few friends like that and that’s why I love them. You should never talk bad about a person. I always believe that the other gossipers are just jealous of how pretty she was and couldn’t help but keep her the topic of conversation.

    3) I think the author wrote about Ellen and Louis’ relationship because that happens in the real world sometimes. Ellen can’t always control her emotions and that’s ok. Sometimes you just have to let some friends go that you don’t always agree with.

    4) Well, I am 26 and all of my friends are married now. So the relationship part, is not exactly how my life is… but the job part, I can totally relate to. Even though I have a successful career, it’s very demanding and I don’t always like that. I change my mind every day and always wonder if there is something else out there for me.

    5) I think Abby is afraid that her friends will judge her based on her parents, but if she would just embrace it, it would make her happier. The insecurities that she has about it make her unhappy and her friends seem to love her family anyway. There really is no need for Abby to be so secretive about them. Everybody’s family is a little different anyway.

  • Erica Shalley

    1) I feel I most relate to Mary. In school I am definitely the bookworm who studies constantly. I am also a very hard worker and will always do my best despite the situation, such as Mary and her job. I also never forget the things that have been said to me in regards to not being good enough such as Mary and the candle she blew out. I also think I am like Mary because I will always be the friend that will be there for others no matter what.

    2)I think this scenario shows you can’t judge a person based only on their appearance.

    3) I think this relationship shows that everyone has that one love that they can never truly let go of.

    4) I believe this is the age where you truly discover who you are. Decisions must be made; school, work, love, or heart break. These are some of the hardest decisions to make but looking back on the hard times and the good times allow us to learn from them and grow into confident and independent women.

    5) I think she keeps a secret because she is ashamed. As a result she is always lying, living her life in fear and having to put on a fake face. She is not being honest with herself and finds it hard to be honest and open with others.

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    1. Isabella is a character I can identify with because of her difficulties with her job ( I’m in the same position now) :-(

    2. Don’t follow the crowd…or judge a book by its cover!

    3. This situation arises in every circle of friends and it’s often hard to watch. However, there comes a point where you have to let go and trust that your friend turns out ok. I think Jennifer included this too because we all lose friends along the way for various reasons and it’s part of growing up.

    4. I always hear your 20s are so confusing & your 30s are much better because you have more of a grasp of who you are, solid relationships & a career path. As a 29 year old, I sure hope that’s true because I’m still trying to figure it all out. This book and these characters give a voice to all us confused 20 somethings and let’s us know that we are not alone!

    5. If you don’t remember where you came from, you will never make it to where you’re going!

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  • Allison Treusch

    1.) The characters that I can relate to the the most are Isabella and Lauren. I think Isabella is easy for girls in the 20′s to relate to. We all have insecurities and question the things that we do. Isabella also has a really big heart. My favorite chapter was blind with Isabella and her nephew Connor. It was a beautifully written chapter. I can also relate to Lauren because when I graduated from college it took me a while to find a good job. I also dated a lot of people that I should not have, but they were there and my life was a mess so I thought why not.

    2.) The Jonbenet scenario taught Isabella not to believe everything people say.

    3.) I believe that the author wrote about Ellen and Louis’s because most people have been in or watched friends in relationships that are bad for us and our friends could see it, but we are clouded by the emotions of everything. This was an outside look of what could happen.

    4.) The girls indecisiveness in the book relates to women in their 20′s because we tend to question a lot of the decisions we make as well as we are still trying to map out the rest of our lives. Its easy to know where you want to go with your life, but it can be hard mapping out the steps that will get you there.

    5.) Abby seems very focused on fitting in. I believe that this is why she hid her parents from her friends. They are different and make her stand out when all she wanted to do was hide and blend in with the crown.

  • Katelyn Malloy

    1. I feel that I relate to Abby and Isabella. Isabella is selfless and goes with the flow, which I feel like I do most of the time. With Abby – sometimes, you are very embarrassed about your family, especially when your friends meet them for the first time. You always wonder if they are normal. But you also see how much she loves them unconditionally no matter what.

    2. Isabella definitely learned not to judge a book by its cover. Even when her relationship with Ben ended, she was still interested in finding out what happened with JonBenet – that actually happens with most people. You hear about someone, judge them based off that, and you end up putting that wall up. It’s interesting that after the fact she wanted to let JonBenet in.

    3. Maybe she wanted to show how blind we become in relationships. That even our friends can see a person’s true colors, but we end up being blind to it all. We become infatuated with the idea of what the relationship could be. Then it comes true and we think we could never get this again. To me, it becomes an instance where the people involved in the relationship need to make the decision, and maybe it was best to not have Ellen involved in the other character’s lives. It’s harsh but true!

    4. When you are about to leave school, teachers will tell you the world is your oyster, and you can do anything you set your mind to. I can’t help but feel like some people work their butts off in college thinking that once they are done, that’s it, and they should be handed some amazing dream job for all their efforts. But that is just not how it works. The only jobs they end up getting are the part time jobs. Yes, you have opportunity to grow, but how far can you really get? As much as I admire Mary’s work ethic, she maybe missed out on her 20-something’s. Maybe I’m just inbetween on my two arguments…I’m a 20-something, with a good full time job, that’s somewhat close to what I wanted to be in after college. Yet, I feel like I missed out on the whole 20-something scene. Does that make sense?

    5. Abby is scared how they will react once they see how different her parents are. But she just needs to move past that insecurity and embrace it. It is truly hurting her in the end.

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  • emerald city

    1. Lauren, she’s the only women that has ever made me think of, and look up, the word soulmate.

    2. I have no idea, I stopped trying to figure out what women think long ago.

    3. See #2, and now my buddies know I’ve been on a website direct towards women.

    4. I can’t speak from a girls perspective, but guys also tend to inaccurately manage expectations. Especially when we are younger.

    5. She has yet to learn better, imo.

  • Marianne Jarvis

    1. I can relate to Isabella the most as I have always felt insecure, inadequate and apprehensive about relationships certainly when they are new and unexpected.

    2. I think she learns not to assume or expect too much of other people. Everyone makes mistakes and not everyone appears as they seem esp in JonBenet’s case.

    3.I think that often many people go back to what they are familiar and comfortable with so they end up going back to the same on or off relationship whilst making the same mistakes over and over again.

    Eventually, Ellen will learn and the author was sending the message about moving on and that sometimes ‘making the same mistake isn’t necessarily a mistake it is a choice.’The author compares this to Isabella who is strong and moves on more swiftly.

    4. Being in my 20′s myself (21), I have felt overwhelmed by the constant pressure of growing up-whether that be finding a job, having a job, paying for rent or bills, socializing, losing friends, deadlines to relationships.

    It can be a struggle esp if you find it difficult in deciding what you want to be or who you want to be hence the uncertainty and indecision. I think some people know exactly what they want out of life, others don’t necessarily. There is no right or wrong and you are learning to stand on your own two feet in the world. It’s an experience,a journey , a complete learning process.

    5. Abby is afraid of judgement in particular from her friends who she fears will not understand her parents. If they were her ‘true’ friends then they will not judge her parents. Abby seems ashamed about her parents which will only lead to her parents being upset and her by her actions. In the process, it will also hurt herself too.

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  • ALLCOMENTS POST

    My Names is Monique Curry ,AM from United states .i never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once when i went to Africa in June last year on a business summit i ment a man called Dr Dahiru, is powerful he could help you cast a spells to bring back my love s gone misbehaving lover looking for some one to love you bring back lost money and magic money spell or spell for a good job i m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 4weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 3 year i really loved him, but his mother was against me and he had no good paying job so when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him at first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try and in 6 days when i returned to taxes my boyfriend (is now my husband ) he called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married i didn’t believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid and my husband also got a new job and our lives became much better in case anyone needs the spell caster for some help his email address: [email protected]

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  • Jenna Steven

    HIS LOVE SPELLS ARE TRULY GENUINE

    Thanks Priest Ajigar for your kind help for you have done what other spell caster could not do for me i am so very happy for my lost joy have just be recovered within 48 hours after you casted the spell on my ex whom i thought we will never be together again after 9 months i am so grateful to you Priest Ajigar for you are really powerful and genuine as they say and i will continue to share this testimony to the whole world.here is his email if you also need his help ([email protected])

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